I always wanted to be a chef; I don’t know why it just happened that way. I remember the first time I walked through the back door of a hotel on my very first day of employment and it was like walking into a totally different world. A world of madness, lunacy and endless stress that no one of sound mind could possibly want….and yet I loved it!
After spending a few months on the job and struggling with this new world, culture shock and daily abuse by the more experienced chefs, I still loved it. That was until my executive chef exclaimed out loud in front of the whole kitchen team, “I have come to the conclusion Saxon, that you will never make a chef as long as you have a hole in your arse!” The other chefs seeing an opportunity to lower my self esteem even further for their personal gain, started laughing to ensure that the pain I was feeling reached the maximum level possible.
I still remember how I felt that day, at 3 am I laid in bed looking at the ceiling and contemplated throwing in the towel, but if I did they would win you see. This is what flames my determination to fulfill my dreams and what keeps me going no matter what happens or whatever life throws at me. There is always someone who will tell you what you can do and what you can’t, but there is only one person that has the final decision on what you will become and that is you. It is your job to ignore all of these trivial obstructions, smile and go about your challenges and the sole purpose should be for you to show everyone who doubts you that they could not be more wrong.
Physical abuse of any individual is horrific, demeaning, criminal and disgraceful, but verbal abuse has taken a back seat and does not get the attention it deserves. People who are suffering with self esteem issues are the most venerable and most affected by verbal abuse. Having gone through this on numerous occasions during my climb to where I am today, I can tell with an open heart that verbal abuse can make people feel worthless.
Although I am far from perfect I do try to choose my words carefully when I am getting hot beneath the collar. It always amazes me how some senior managers expect their staff to smile with a happy face greeting their customers when deep down they are heart broken after being abused or scolded in public.
Each and every one of us is beautiful, valuable, special and without doubt able to be an incredibly important pillar of society. We must not let anyone destroy our soul with words that are intended to penetrate our perceived fragile heart. We must believe that we are educated, as educated people do not react to belittlement, if someone calls you a fool and you are not then the words are ridiculous and harmless.
We are all responsible for the people around us, we are jointly responsible for their state of mind and we must help them feel better than they are feeling at that moment in time when we converse with them.
I would encourage all my readers to never give up on your dreams, no matter who tells you that they are out of your reach, that they can not be accomplished, that you are not capable and that you don’t deserve them.
After reading this, I urge you to write down what you want to accomplish, plan out a path how to reach your goals and whoever is standing in front of you with their arms spread out trying to convince you that you can’t reach them, smile and walk on by, as today is your day and tomorrow holds your dreams.
I am typing this as I look at my soul mate and two beautiful daughters playing together and with my hand on my heart, I can assure you that I am living my dream and you can and must live yours…Happy dreaming!